Sermon notes

We are all born with a real sense of justice. We are all naturally inclined to retaliation and revenge. We don't have to be trained in it...we naturally attack. We have a refusal to tolerate injustice...
the problem becomes that retaliation rarely brings about peace, since we all have a different sense of "justice"....just continues to build and hurt. Reconstruction is always harder than you think its going to be, it takes longer than expected and the tools you will need end up being the tools you don't have. 

matthew 5:38
"an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth." justice. seems fair and straight. but what Jesus is after is the transformation of our inward motivations. "do not resist the one who is evil, but if anyone slaps you on the right check, give them your other...if someone sues you for your inward garments, give them your outer garments too...if anyone who forces you to go one mile, go two miles..." contrary to our gut. Jesus changes our way of living and our filter in seeing the world around us. The more the world revolves around YOU, the more anxious, fearful and miserable YOU will become. If you are the point of it all, you will need everyone to be perfect and heap on expectations that are not good for them but good for YOU. The more you get freed from that the happiness can seep in. Christ is deconstructing our personal self interest being our focus. 

5:43 "love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you... He lets the sun rise on the good and the evil...if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than another" There is nothing natural or easy about loving your enemy. NATURAL is loving who loves us and hating who hates us. proverbs "a kind word is like heaping burning coals on ones head" ...how do people respond with heaping coals? agitation? anger? boldness to attack all the more? When you are kind to your enemies...it will press on deep seeded soul issues...and it may come out in rage. But the opportunity for reconciliation and peace is there IF YOU LOVE. None of that reward will exist if your plan is  retaliation & revenge...you will simply escalate it. Christ is interested in our motive and our motive being how we see the first part of the text. Sometimes the most loving thing I can do if someone slaps my check is NOT allow them to slap my other cheek, to not give them my tunic, to refuse to walk a mile with them. EXAMPLE: "sick child vomiting wants cake...is love giving her cake and milk or saying no, i'm not giving you that." Our motive being love are the lenses in which we see the world. How do you work thru this? motivated by love, we are to decide in the moment how to respond to our enemies. Like seeing thru mud. Is my motive self preservation, pride of self or is it genuinely love? 

WALK IN WISDOM. 
Don't be "biblically ignorant"..must be able apply the truths of the scriptures not just spit them out. Are you able to drain from your food the nutrients in your food if you've very quickly vomited it up and not digested it? Thats bulimia and people DIE from that disorder. Knowing verses does not mean you know your bible. We have to be able to digest and apply. If you LACK wisdom from the Word of God and aren't walking in community with others...this is nearly impossible. You will most always pick what's best for you, not what's good for the needs of others. Community, truth tellers in your life...not people you have "on your side" difference between people who value your friendship over valuing your soul. All of this feels impossible. 

How do we grow in love in such a way that we have the capacity to love our enemies
1. Grow in our understanding of being children of God.
God has forgiven you. God delights in you. God is passionate about you. God feels things concerning you. God loves you. But if we don't understand God as Father, then we will doubt situations and scenarios, then we won't trust him to be our Father. Matthew 6:31-32

2. We have to live with eternity in mind. 
Romans 8:19 "for i consider the sufferings at this time do not compare to the glory in store" 2 corinthians 4:16-18 "so we do not lose heart...as we look not to the things that are seen but the things that are unseen" regardless of the difficulties we are in right now, they will seem light and momentary to what is coming to us as God's children. Cancer. Death. Pain. Hurt. these things do NOT SEEM MOMENTARY until we get our eyes on what's eternal. Get our eyes on what is unseen, not on what is seen. Things seen are going to go away. What can men take from you if this is how you see? 

3. Greater understanding of what we've been save from, how we've been saved and for the reality if it were not for the grace of God we would be the givers of injustice and not just the receivers of injustice.
eph 2:1-3 "As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, ² in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. ³ All of us also lived among them at one time,gratifying the cravings of our flesh^[a] and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature deserving of wrath. ⁴ But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, ⁵ made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. ⁶ And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, ⁷ in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. ⁸ For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— ⁹ not by works, so that no one can boast. ¹⁰ For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." there is no difference from a silent rebellious person and a vocal rebellious person. It is by the grace of God alone that we have been saved. until we acknowledge that we are the chief among sinners, we are unable to extend grace because we don't believe that we received a lot of grace. 

how are we responding to those who are actively against us? don't ever be surprised when lost people act lost. don't ever be surprised when immature believers act immature. this is God rebuilding the walls...so that when my cheek gets slapped I don't attack, but responding with a heart motivated by love...knowing that I am a child of God and knowing that grace as I remember the grace given to me.

Unguarded

I love relationship, friendship and joy. I don't like competition, manipulation or jealousy. And so many of the time I find myself caught up in boat number 2...headed in a direction I don't want to go. "The spirit is willing but my flesh is weak"...My mind, my heart and my soul get caught up in anger and bitterness. It's not pretty and it's nowhere close to Heaven.

I'm holding tightly to  Philippians 4:7 "and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ." I must burry myself in scripture, guard myself with truth... I can always tell when I haven't been diligent in my quiet times or studies...when I haven't invested in the truth. It's a daily battle...it's a life of praise. When I let myself get lazy or get comfortable, I become unguarded.

Random spurts. Random thoughts.

I need You, Jesus. Today and everyday.

yep.

I have to be done. 

Proverbs 12:26 "One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray."

Proverbs 13:20 "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."

Proverbs 14:6-7 "A scoffer seeks wisdom in vain, but knowledge is easy for a man of understanding. Leave the presence of a fool, for there you do not meet words of knowledge."

Proverbs 22:24-25 "Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare."

1 Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals.”

2 Corinthians 6:14 "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"

Proverbs 4:23 "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

Luke 6:45 "A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of"

PREGNANCY!

After a fun and exciting weekend in New York City, we found out that a baby beach was in the making!!


Today I am 8weeks 3 days pregnant! So for anyone who cares, and for me to look back on...i'll be posting updates/pictures...etc! Prayers please...this whole process is a little scary!


Pregnancy Survey- 
How far along? 8w 3daysTotal weight gain? Lost 7 lbs Maternity clothes? not yet, but ready for some!Stretch marks? Not yetSleep? I wake up to pee in the early mornings and have difficulty falling back asleep.Best moment this week? Finally getting to 8 weeks!Miss anything? Alcohol...my best friend had her bachelorette party/wedding this weekend. That was a bummerMovement? Not yet, way too early for that. Food cravings? Not really, but when I do crave something I better get or i'll get super cranky.Food aversions? All day. Queso makes me sick even thinking about it :( sad dayGender? Chris thinks girl, I think boy...too early to tell right nowLabor signs? NopeSymptoms? Tender breasts, gas, headaches, nausea, moody...Wedding rings on or off? OnBelly button in or out? InLooking forward to? My next appointment on May 31!

Worship

There are some days that my heart leaps at the thought of the Lord. I can confess...no, not every day..but some days. Today is one of those days...I just want to run screaming down the street "GOD IS GOOD" but I don't think that would encourage or direct anyone's attention to God...just to me, and they might think i'm on drugs, which in turn would be a stumbling block.. HOWEVER, I can write this silly little blog, post a few scriptures on my facebook and twitter, text a few friends and let them know i'm holding them up in prayer today. I can get on my face and laugh and cry and thank my heavenly Father...SO I WILL.

As I type this, I hurt for those who have never and will never experience this INCOMPARABLE and UNEXPLAINABLE joy. Close friends, close family, even church members...will miss this. Why? Well that's pretty simple actually. Pride. Fear. Doubts. Lust. Lies.

I use to wonder how some had so much joy for Christ and I didn't. It would piss me off, to be quite honest. Then one day someone told me, it wasn't God who was choosing not to reveal himself to me...but it was ME being too wrapped up in myself to allow Him to reveal himself to me... It was as if I was too concerned with watching my favorite movie, that I completely missed the BEST episode on TV. That episode won't be on hulu, I didn't record it, there will never be a re-run. It's done and gone. One day another episode like it will come, and it too will be the BEST, but I have to stop watching my "favorite movie" to see it. Silly comparison I know, but hopefully you get the picture.

Don't pass up another chance at joy created and designed specifically for YOU. Let God pour down His abundant love on you. Let Him bless you.

I promise it'll be the best thing you have ever experienced. Scout's honor!

Dad's

I was blessed with an AMAZING earthly Father. One who loves me deeply, prays for me constantly and catches me when I fall. Not everyone get to say this about their Father...It breaks my heart. So for all of you men out there, be this kind of Dad...and if you are not a man or won't be having children...pass this along. More people need to hear this...

50 Rules for Dads of Daughters 

By Michael Mitchell

1. Love her mom. Treat her mother with respect, honor, and a big heaping spoonful of public displays of affection. When she grows up, the odds are good she’ll fall in love with and marry someone who treats her much like you treated her mother. Good or bad, that’s just the way it is. I’d prefer good.

2. Always be there. Quality time doesn’t happen without quantity time. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence. Be genuinely interested in the things that interest her. She needs her dad to be involved in her life at every stage. Don’t just sit idly by while she add years to her… add life to her years.

3. Save the day. She’ll grow up looking for a hero. It might as well be you. She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life. Rise to the occasion. Red cape and blue tights optional.

4. Savor every moment you have together. Today she’s crawling around the house in diapers, tomorrow you’re handing her the keys to the car, and before you know it, you’re walking her down the aisle. Some day soon, hanging out with her old man won’t be the bees knees anymore. Life happens pretty fast. You better cherish it while you can.

5. Pray for her. Regularly. Passionately. Continually.

6. Buy her a glove and teach her to throw a baseball. Make her proud to throw like a girl… a girl with a wicked slider.

7. She will fight with her mother. Choose sides wisely.

8. Go ahead. Buy her those pearls.

9. Of course you look silly playing peek-a-boo. You should play anyway.

10. Enjoy the wonder of bath time.

11. There will come a day when she asks for a puppy. Don’t over think it. At least one time in her life, just say, “Yes.”

12. It’s never too early to start teaching her about money. She will still probably suck you dry as a teenager… and on her wedding day.

13. Make pancakes in the shape of her age for breakfast on her birthday. In a pinch, donuts with pink sprinkles and a candle will suffice.

14. Buy her a pair of Chucks as soon as she starts walking. She won’t always want to wear matching shoes with her old man.

15. Dance with her. Start when she’s a little girl or even when she’s a baby. Don’t wait ‘til her wedding day.

16. Take her fishing. She will probably squirm more than the worm on your hook. That’s OK.

17. Learn to say no. She may pitch a fit today, but someday you’ll both be glad you stuck to your guns.

18. Tell her she’s beautiful. Say it over and over again. Someday an animated movie or “beauty” magazine will try to convince her otherwise.

19. Teach her to change a flat. A tire without air need not be a major panic inducing event in her life. She’ll still call you crying the first time it happens.

20. Take her camping. Immerse her in the great outdoors. Watch her eyes fill with wonder the first time she sees the beauty of wide open spaces. Leave the iPod at home.

21. Let her hold the wheel. She will always remember when daddy let her drive.

22. She’s as smart as any boy. Make sure she knows that.

23. When she learns to give kisses, she will want to plant them all over your face. Encourage this practice.

24. Knowing how to eat sunflower seeds correctly will not help her get into a good college. Teach her anyway.

25. Letting her ride on your shoulders is pure magic. Do it now while you have a strong back and she’s still tiny.

26. It is in her nature to make music. It’s up to you to introduce her to the joy of socks on a wooden floor.

27. If there’s a lake near your home, take her there often. She will be drawn to the water like a duck to a puddle.

28. She will eagerly await your return home from work in the evenings. Don’t be late.

29. If her mom enrolls her in swim lessons, make sure you get in the pool too. Don’t be intimidated if there are no other dads there. It’s their loss.

30. Never miss her birthday. In ten years she won’t remember the present you gave her. She will remember if you weren’t there.

31. Teach her to roller skate. Watch her confidence soar.

32. Let her roll around in the grass. It’s good for her soul. It’s not bad for yours either.

33. Take her swimsuit shopping. Don’t be afraid to veto some of her choices, but resist the urge to buy her full-body beach pajamas.

34. Somewhere between the time she turns three and her sixth birthday, the odds are good that she will ask you to marry her. Let her down gently.

35. She’ll probably want to crawl in bed with you after a nightmare. This is a good thing

36. Few things in life are more comforting to a crying little girl than her father’s hand. Never forget this.

37. Introduce her to the swings at your local park. She’ll squeal for you to push her higher and faster. Her definition of “higher and faster” is probably not the same as yours. Keep that in mind.

38. When she’s a bit older, your definition of higher and faster will be a lot closer to hers. When that day comes, go ahead… give it all you’ve got.

39. Holding her upside down by the legs while she giggles and screams uncontrollably is great for your biceps. WARNING: She has no concept of muscle fatigue.

40. She might ask you to buy her a pony on her birthday. Unless you live on a farm, do not buy her a pony on her birthday. It’s OK to rent one though.

41. Take it easy on the presents for her birthday and Christmas. Instead, give her the gift of experiences you can share together.

42. Let her know she can always come home. No matter what.

43. Remember, just like a butterfly, she too will spread her wings and fly some day. Enjoy her caterpillar years.

44. Write her a handwritten letter every year on her birthday. Give them to her when she goes off to college, becomes a mother herself, or when you think she needs them most.

45. Learn to trust her. Gradually give her more freedom as she gets older. She will rise to the expectations you set for her.

46. When in doubt, trust your heart. She already does.

47. When your teenage daughter is upset, learning when to engage and when to back off will add years to YOUR life. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

48. Ice cream covers over a multitude of sins. Know her favorite flavor.

49. She will like boys. This day is coming soon. There’s nothing you can do to be ready for it. The sooner you accept this fact, the easier it will be.

50. Today she’s walking down the driveway to get on the school bus. Tomorrow she’s going off to college. Don’t blink.

Broken things need fixing

Today was one of those days that the moment you get out of bed, you wish you never had. I woke up at 5:30am to make my wonderful husband his breakfast and pack his lunch, took our sweet little doggie for a walk and then crawled back into bed. A few hours later, when I decided to check the time, realized I had slept through my second alarm!! Jumped in the shower and rushed to good ole San Jac to finish my piece on the company. 5 minutes there I was ready to punch a few of the dancers in the face...I'm awful, I know.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't such a people pleaser or that I didn't always look for the best in people or that I didn't trust people so easily...but I am...that's who I have been designed to be.

After time and time again of not being able to please everyone, being disappointed in others choices...the reasons are endless...I STILL DON'T CHANGE MY EXPECTATIONS.
Why? Why do I desire to constantly fix every broken relationship I have walked through...EVEN IF IT WAS UNHEALTHY? Ex boyfriends, friends who have hurt me deeply, wounds that are STILL being healed? Why do I insist on becoming everyone's best friend? Why do I obsess over making sure your heart is pleased?

When I brought these questions up tonight in our car ride to the church...my patient husband (after I ranted for 30 minutes) so flawlessly and efortlessly said  "We were created for unity."
Why didn't I think of that...
Our creator designed us to crave the good, crave the perfect, crave the beautiful. Why? Because it's who He is! Of course we wan't to fix things, we know they're broken. We see the flaws and we don't find joy in those. Knowing that doesn't make it easier when we get hurt...but it does give us hope. One day we will live in unity. One day every knee will bow and there will be NO more tears.

Until then, I will be the person who will stalk you on facebook...comment on every other status and every other picture. Be over joyed when you tell me the littlest thing. Cry why someone unintentionally hurts my feelings. Text and call you even if I don't particularly like you at that moment. Smile even if I want to cry. Pray even if I don't feel like it. And worship even in the storm.

I love you. More than you know. I do wish the best for you...even if I hate you right now...i'll get over it and I will forgive you...because God is making a new creation..and I don't want to miss it.